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Trump tells the convention (maybe)

carlson

Again turning convention and conventions on its head, Donald Trump addressed the Republican Convention on its first day of the gathering in Cleveland. The following is an imagined text of what he said (or should say).

“My fellow Republicans. First, let me welcome you all to the great city of Cleveland, home of the NBA World Champion Cleveland Cavaliers and LeBron James. That man has game, doesn’t he? He promised he would bring a world championship to Cleveland and he delivered. It is so rare nowadays to see a man stand up, promise something and then deliver. Pretty rare, pretty rare.

So unlike the professional politicians and pundits who live inside that surreal world inside the beltway called Washington, D. C. We all know the answer to that old question – how can you tell when a politician or a pundit is lying? That’s right, their lips are moving.

Nine months ago I announced that I was running for president. All those experts and all those media mavens treated it as a joke but I knew something that they didn’t see or care to see. I knew the American people were tired of being lied to by their president and their government.

I knew that those hard-working folks in what they call the middle class felt that the playing field was no longer level, fair and balanced, that their son with a degree from Cleveland State stood no chance of competing for a job with a rich kid who had gone to Harvard or Yale.

I knew that they knew they were being screwed every day, taxed to death and over-regulated. I knew they knew that the American dream was disappearing with jobs being shipped to the Chinese and the Indians.

I knew that many Americans no longer felt safe in their own country, that illegal immigrants, many of whom were criminals, were getting ino this country and I knew they knew we had to stop the flow of refugees from the Middle East into this country until we figured out a better way.

I knew that you knew our fine military was hamstrung by a president and a secretary of state who didn’t trust our military to do a job, tied their hands and then lied about their failure to save some of America’s fine diplomats.

I knew that you knew America was on a downhill slide into mediocrity. And I knew you knew that America could and should be great again.

I knew too what you knew, that what this country needed was some real changes, real reforms and I knew that you knew that kind of change would never come from anyone on the inside; that you knew and I knew that the next president had to be an outsider, someone who was uncorrupted by the wealthy and influential.

And I knew that you knew this country could not withstand allowing the Clintons and their way of doing business back into the White House.

And I knew that you knew there were millions of alienated voters out there who would respond to my message—-that I shared their dismay, that I knew what they were saying, and I knew I could lead our nation to greatness once again.

Guess what? I was correct and all those pundits and critics and nay-sayers were wrong.

Guess what, my friends? All those pundits and wanna be presidents still don’t get it, do they? It should not be that difficult to figure out that only an outsider can bring real change, but they don’t get it.

The consequence of their ignorance is a constant distortion of what I say or how I say it. Words are taken out of context, phrases are misconstrued and misunderstood.

The elite media have decided conclusively that they want the status quo and the old way of doing business and that Hillary Clinton is the one who will take care of them.

They are going to do everything they can to see me smeared, my family besmirched, my taxes re-examined, my private life researched.

Well, I have a surprise for them my friends.

I wanted to address this convention on the first day,rather than the last because I have decided it is in the best interests of the nation and the Republican party that I withdraw my candidacy and free my delegates to vote for whomever they wish.

Without me to kick around your, choice will be given a better shot at making a case to the American people.

As General Sherman said, “if nominated I will not run. If elected I will not serve!”

So with sadness I renounce my presumptive nominee status. I’ll make no endorsements and accept whomever you choose. Good luck in your deliberations.

God bless America.

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